Yes, I have been absent from here for some time, yet again. First it was work, driving me up a wall, then, I went out of town for a few days. As usual, I have made a few observations.
First, work sucks. I love my job, and I really can’t think of a better place to be doing it, however, I hate getting up in the morning, busting ass all day, barely getting thanked for it (sometimes getting fussed at), and not getting any real extra cash from the deal. Yes, I get commission, however, I spend too many hours on other things at the office, so, I really am only just making up the difference to get some semblance of decent pay for the hours I put in. It rather does suck mightily.
Second, back pain and stiff joints are wonderful for a road trip. Now, you may be wondering how that could be, but, try driving 6 hours after a full day of work like I’ve just described, racing to get things done on time before going out of town, and then packing in a rush, and you will see how right I am. At 2 AM, when you are ready to go to sleep, that same pain that prevents it when at home, does wonders for keeping focused on the road. At least it did for me. Painkiller will only diminish this effect, and therefore lead to sleep. Not good on a long drive.
Third, I miss my Dad. Now this was a bit of a shock how I came to the realization, but, bear with me on this. I was looking forward to going to visit him and see the NASCAR race at Talladega Superspeedway. He got remarried last December, at a time when I could not be there because of other travel plans. He came down to work the golf tournament here in New Orleans last year, but was considering not working it again, because his new wife could not take time off from work, and our job assignment was turning to crap. The assignment was cleared up, letting us only work the weekend, and suddenly, now they are both going to be coming down to work the tournament. All of this was before I went to the race this past weekend. Also, virtually every time I wanted to call him, he was either out with her on errands, or at the Pub, drinking, and would stop the conversation with me to take a shot of schnapps. This had been getting worse leading up to this weekend. Now, on race weekend, I expected it to be night after night pf partying at the Pub, just like it was last year. Not a surprise on that one. And, the Pub was closing after race weekend, so, it was going to be "a party to end all parties". Or so I thought. Things started out about like they typically did last year (the year before, our first trip to the race, Dad did not know of the Pub’s existence, so, we did not go there then). The band started, we were drinking, and starting to have a good time. I was not looking forward to having that good of a time, as my Dad and step-mother were acting all cutesy, lovey-dovey. Very annoying to watch (my apologies for every time I have done that to someone else while I was dating someone). Just when I was about to lose hope for any sort of fun for the weekend, in walked another regular of the Pub - a young lady about ten years my junior - who knew Dad from the Pub. He introduced us, and we had a great time talking, drinking and joking around. It was nice to have someone closer to my age that was not there with anyone else so that we could converse without (at least from my perspective) feeling like a third wheel. This was a good thing. Since I am married, I decided to treat her like my fun sister-in-law (my wife’s youngest sister). The evening went along, with Dad taking pictures, me drinking lots of vodka and beer, and us all having a pretty good time. I drove us home (as I was the most sober amongst the three of us - Dad, my step-mother, and myself), and the next day was the first day at the races. Dad fawned over my step-mother the whole day. Semi-nauseating to watch. We went back to the Pub for the second night. More of the same, the girl from the previous night was there, and she brought a friend. We all had a good time, I danced some (had plenty of liquid courage), took more pictures, hung out with the band, drunk the roadie under the table, etc.. Another good night for me, but, I was mostly drinking to not think about the situation with Dad. Saturday was a repeat of Friday, but, without as much drinking - too many nights in a row of things, plus, it was a downer of a night, as it was the last night the Pub would be open. Everyone was grabbing posters of the drivers, and such that were decorations. The only real people there were the regulars, and a couple of out of towners. The Pub owner had a falling out with his girlfriend, so the young lady and her friend (from the previous night) were invited to go to the race the next day, and we all rode together, so the day was not that bad for me - something to distract me from the sap fest - in general. Now, I have said all this to lay the foundation for the revelation I made earlier: I miss my Dad. This trip, I did not get to have any alone time with him, like on previous trips. The first was just the two of us, and last year, a guy he used to work with and his son came up, so it was a dual father-son event, and we all had a good time. This year, I was the third wheel, and I got mad at myself for not asserting that I wanted some alone time with him. It also bothered me that there were total strangers who got to spend more time with him than I did anymore. When I got home (after some construction nightmares driving home), I called to let him know I got in OK, and he was already lit up like a Christmas tree, the Pub owner was over at his house, and the girl I had been hanging out with had stopped by earlier. I was livid, and, after not seeing my wife for 5 days, I went on a rant when she got home. I had to get it out of my system.
I have to talk to him when he is not drunk, is not around my step-mother, and get all of this off my chest. I think I will feel much better when I do.
I think that will be enough for today’s entry. More will follow later.
K
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Friday, September 21, 2007
Word Processors
OK, so, in just a couple of words, I discovered that using a word processor program is not much better than directly typing here. I seem to have typos rampant. I need to remember to use the spell check, and proofread my work first. Sorry about that folks.
K
K
The Reports of My Death......
It’s ben a while since I posted anything here. Much has happened, and I will attempt to discuss as much as I can here. Sadly, much of it is political, so, I will be breaking my self-imposed ban on political discussion here.
First - the Jena 6. The entire situation is FUBAR. If you don’t know what it means, just remember that it’s German, then go watch Saving Private Ryan. You’ll get it then. Anyway, Louisiana is becoming the laughing stock of the world, again. It started out with a tree on school grounds that was a prominent white student hang out. Two things happened: 1) a black student asked if it was O.K. for blacks to sit under the tree; 2) a pep rally was held wherein effigies of the opposing team were hanged from the tree by nooses (this part is not being covered by, as Rush would say, the Drive-By Media). Shortly after this, the nooses remained, sans the effigies, and the black students were taunted by the white students. Then, six black students beat a white student severely. Here is the problem: they were charged as adults with attempted murder, among other things, the white students were just suspended from school. The first trial was held, and an all white jury, with a white DA, and a white judge, convicted the student, who was tried as an adult (having had a prior criminal record). This, of course, raised the hackles of the Dynamic Duo of Race Baiting - the Reverands Jesse and Al. So, they organized protests, marches, and media coverage.
Here is my take on it: In a recent press conference, the DA stated that there was nothing he could charge the white students with, so he chose not to prosecute them. That is a crock of shit. They could at least be charged with disturbing the peace, and, after this week’s media circus, inciting a riot. And, since those are crimes, they could be tagged with the "hate crime" additur. That, at least, would be something. There was nothing. Now, while attempted murder may be a bit much to charge the black students with, six of them beat up one other student. That, by Louisiana law, qualifies as a "gang attack", and would get that multiplier, though, it still only really amounts to assault and battery, aggravated if a weapon was used. Moving on to the trial, trying someone as a child or adult is a decision for the DA, and, on appeal, the Appeals court found that the one defendant tried so far should not have been tried as an adult. Additionally, I want to know who the defense attorney was that let the jury be selected as all white. Surely there were some blacks selected in that jury pool. I think it is a failure on the part of that attorney to properly pick the jury, this equaling "ineffective assistance of counsel". That may have been one of his trial strategies all along. It’s not unheard of to give an automatic out for the appeals court, but it does open up the guy to malpractice and/or a bar complaint for not doing his job properly, if that was his strategy. Compound things by having a massive march on the town, with the requisite media invasion. The entire town was practically shut down yesterday as a result. Perhaps that was the point of the marchers, so that more attention was drawn to their cause. Now, as to my comments about Jesse and Al - they will always be the first to scream racism from the highest mountain top, but, when proven wrong in a situation, they will never admit they were wrong (see Duke Lacrosse Team Rape Case - white students cleared well after the election, race made issue, mostly so DA there could win the election in a 50/50 population area). Every time that racism is alleged, whether right or wrong, the big part of Dr. King’s plan - a color blind society - is ignored. Yes, injustice is injustice. I would be saying the same thing if colors were reversed here, or other colors were involved. And that is the crux of y argument - what happened to the Jena 6 should not have happened to anyone, of any race, sex, religion, color, whatever, anytime, anyplace, and certainly not in America.
Second - Iraq war and the MoveOn.Org ad. What happened: this organization placed an ad in the New York Times, at a severely marked down rate, that insulted General Petraeus (sp?) and belittled our military because President Bush will not surrender in Iraq. Every conservative that heard about this is completely up in arms about it. After several days, liberals, and Democrats in particular, finally began to distance themselves only slightly from the ad and the organization. The Senate voted 72 to something condemning the ad. Guilliani (sp?) wanted to, and succeeded in taking out an opposition ad, at the same rate (though he had to fight them for it). Media feeding frenzy number two ensues, as both sides battle fiercely on the airwaves for supremacy on the issue.
Here’s my take on this one: MoveOn has the right to say what they want. First Amendment. However, they need to understand that not everyone will agree with them, and be prepared to deal with consequences of their actions. Additionally, in my experience, and as can be seen when watching the news or reading the paper lately, liberals have what appears to be a tendency to preach "political correctness" and non-offensive speech as often as possible. This, in my opinion, puts a limit on what can be said, therefore limiting free speech. It is just as offensive to my sensibilities as many conservatives who say that you have no right to bad mouth the country or the President. That, too, is a crock of shit. Our country was founded on the principle that we can say things like that - we put it in the Constitution because England would not let us do that. That is the same reason we have freedoms of the press, religion, and others. The problem as I see it, is that people are not willing to have open, educated discourse on the subject, listen to the opinions of others, and, if unable to come to a reasonable agreement between the two opinions, agree to disagree. It is PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE that people may not agree on something. In terms of speaking about it, I have a right to say what I want, but I also have a RESPONSIBILITY to take into account other’s feelings and opinions, and try to be sensible in expressing my thoughts. I expect the same from others, but I just don’t get it all that often, and certainly not from watching the news.
As an aside, and a personal peeve related to this issue, the Office of the President of the United States should be respected. Whether you like the guy, voted for him, think he’s an asshole, or whatever. He’s still the President, and should be accorded the dignity of that office. Even though I personally despise the Clintons, Bill was President, and, at least in writing, I respect that fact, and try to address him with proper dignity (capitalizing "president", generally stating "President Clinton" or "during the Clinton Presidency" or something similar). I’d just like the same from the media about President Bush. All I keep seeing is after one mention that he’s the President, they just say "Mr. Bush". That ought to stop. I did not used to be this way. I seem to remember it only starting around 2000.
Third - Hurricanes and tropical storms. This one has me hopping mad. Especially given the state of current affairs and recent happenings in our area. There is a small disturbance that was in the Atlantic, that crossed over Florida, and was sitting there for a couple days without doing much, just meandering slowly our way. Since the media is into "Horrorcanes" instead of actually reporting the news, we have been inundated with "watch out!". I’m kinda tired of it. I’ve looked at the damn thing, it’s just going to be rain and some wind. Granted, we still have a large population in FEMA trailers, and they have to be careful when someone farts in their general direction. However, the media plays it up for ratings, instead of calmly reporting the facts, and letting people decide what they need to do, and then do it. The Governor has declared a state of emergency, and we have been issued just about every warning imaginable. We live in Panic Town, USA. Yippee! People just have no idea how to be prepared and stay that way, having plans made, ready to enact, then sit back and wait to see if they need to kick them in. Am I the only sane one down here anymore????
OK, so, I have gone on a few rants here. I expect that if anyone actually reads this thing, I’ll likely garner some feedback. But hey, that’s the nature of opinions, folks. Freedom of speech allows us to state things we want to say. And, I think I have been about as judicious as I can be, and state my opinions in such a way as to make it clear that they are opinions. I just remind my readers (if there are any) of what Voltaire one said, "I may not agree with a word you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it."
K
First - the Jena 6. The entire situation is FUBAR. If you don’t know what it means, just remember that it’s German, then go watch Saving Private Ryan. You’ll get it then. Anyway, Louisiana is becoming the laughing stock of the world, again. It started out with a tree on school grounds that was a prominent white student hang out. Two things happened: 1) a black student asked if it was O.K. for blacks to sit under the tree; 2) a pep rally was held wherein effigies of the opposing team were hanged from the tree by nooses (this part is not being covered by, as Rush would say, the Drive-By Media). Shortly after this, the nooses remained, sans the effigies, and the black students were taunted by the white students. Then, six black students beat a white student severely. Here is the problem: they were charged as adults with attempted murder, among other things, the white students were just suspended from school. The first trial was held, and an all white jury, with a white DA, and a white judge, convicted the student, who was tried as an adult (having had a prior criminal record). This, of course, raised the hackles of the Dynamic Duo of Race Baiting - the Reverands Jesse and Al. So, they organized protests, marches, and media coverage.
Here is my take on it: In a recent press conference, the DA stated that there was nothing he could charge the white students with, so he chose not to prosecute them. That is a crock of shit. They could at least be charged with disturbing the peace, and, after this week’s media circus, inciting a riot. And, since those are crimes, they could be tagged with the "hate crime" additur. That, at least, would be something. There was nothing. Now, while attempted murder may be a bit much to charge the black students with, six of them beat up one other student. That, by Louisiana law, qualifies as a "gang attack", and would get that multiplier, though, it still only really amounts to assault and battery, aggravated if a weapon was used. Moving on to the trial, trying someone as a child or adult is a decision for the DA, and, on appeal, the Appeals court found that the one defendant tried so far should not have been tried as an adult. Additionally, I want to know who the defense attorney was that let the jury be selected as all white. Surely there were some blacks selected in that jury pool. I think it is a failure on the part of that attorney to properly pick the jury, this equaling "ineffective assistance of counsel". That may have been one of his trial strategies all along. It’s not unheard of to give an automatic out for the appeals court, but it does open up the guy to malpractice and/or a bar complaint for not doing his job properly, if that was his strategy. Compound things by having a massive march on the town, with the requisite media invasion. The entire town was practically shut down yesterday as a result. Perhaps that was the point of the marchers, so that more attention was drawn to their cause. Now, as to my comments about Jesse and Al - they will always be the first to scream racism from the highest mountain top, but, when proven wrong in a situation, they will never admit they were wrong (see Duke Lacrosse Team Rape Case - white students cleared well after the election, race made issue, mostly so DA there could win the election in a 50/50 population area). Every time that racism is alleged, whether right or wrong, the big part of Dr. King’s plan - a color blind society - is ignored. Yes, injustice is injustice. I would be saying the same thing if colors were reversed here, or other colors were involved. And that is the crux of y argument - what happened to the Jena 6 should not have happened to anyone, of any race, sex, religion, color, whatever, anytime, anyplace, and certainly not in America.
Second - Iraq war and the MoveOn.Org ad. What happened: this organization placed an ad in the New York Times, at a severely marked down rate, that insulted General Petraeus (sp?) and belittled our military because President Bush will not surrender in Iraq. Every conservative that heard about this is completely up in arms about it. After several days, liberals, and Democrats in particular, finally began to distance themselves only slightly from the ad and the organization. The Senate voted 72 to something condemning the ad. Guilliani (sp?) wanted to, and succeeded in taking out an opposition ad, at the same rate (though he had to fight them for it). Media feeding frenzy number two ensues, as both sides battle fiercely on the airwaves for supremacy on the issue.
Here’s my take on this one: MoveOn has the right to say what they want. First Amendment. However, they need to understand that not everyone will agree with them, and be prepared to deal with consequences of their actions. Additionally, in my experience, and as can be seen when watching the news or reading the paper lately, liberals have what appears to be a tendency to preach "political correctness" and non-offensive speech as often as possible. This, in my opinion, puts a limit on what can be said, therefore limiting free speech. It is just as offensive to my sensibilities as many conservatives who say that you have no right to bad mouth the country or the President. That, too, is a crock of shit. Our country was founded on the principle that we can say things like that - we put it in the Constitution because England would not let us do that. That is the same reason we have freedoms of the press, religion, and others. The problem as I see it, is that people are not willing to have open, educated discourse on the subject, listen to the opinions of others, and, if unable to come to a reasonable agreement between the two opinions, agree to disagree. It is PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE that people may not agree on something. In terms of speaking about it, I have a right to say what I want, but I also have a RESPONSIBILITY to take into account other’s feelings and opinions, and try to be sensible in expressing my thoughts. I expect the same from others, but I just don’t get it all that often, and certainly not from watching the news.
As an aside, and a personal peeve related to this issue, the Office of the President of the United States should be respected. Whether you like the guy, voted for him, think he’s an asshole, or whatever. He’s still the President, and should be accorded the dignity of that office. Even though I personally despise the Clintons, Bill was President, and, at least in writing, I respect that fact, and try to address him with proper dignity (capitalizing "president", generally stating "President Clinton" or "during the Clinton Presidency" or something similar). I’d just like the same from the media about President Bush. All I keep seeing is after one mention that he’s the President, they just say "Mr. Bush". That ought to stop. I did not used to be this way. I seem to remember it only starting around 2000.
Third - Hurricanes and tropical storms. This one has me hopping mad. Especially given the state of current affairs and recent happenings in our area. There is a small disturbance that was in the Atlantic, that crossed over Florida, and was sitting there for a couple days without doing much, just meandering slowly our way. Since the media is into "Horrorcanes" instead of actually reporting the news, we have been inundated with "watch out!". I’m kinda tired of it. I’ve looked at the damn thing, it’s just going to be rain and some wind. Granted, we still have a large population in FEMA trailers, and they have to be careful when someone farts in their general direction. However, the media plays it up for ratings, instead of calmly reporting the facts, and letting people decide what they need to do, and then do it. The Governor has declared a state of emergency, and we have been issued just about every warning imaginable. We live in Panic Town, USA. Yippee! People just have no idea how to be prepared and stay that way, having plans made, ready to enact, then sit back and wait to see if they need to kick them in. Am I the only sane one down here anymore????
OK, so, I have gone on a few rants here. I expect that if anyone actually reads this thing, I’ll likely garner some feedback. But hey, that’s the nature of opinions, folks. Freedom of speech allows us to state things we want to say. And, I think I have been about as judicious as I can be, and state my opinions in such a way as to make it clear that they are opinions. I just remind my readers (if there are any) of what Voltaire one said, "I may not agree with a word you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it."
K
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
Lessons From the Road
This weekend, my wife and I went to Atlanta to visit her mother. In addition, her sister came down from North Carolina, I was planning on taking Sunday to go to Dragon*Con, and on the way home on Monday, we were stopping by my Dad’s place in Alabama, since it was pretty much on the way we had to go. It was a great weekend, but, from it, I got a couple of perspectives on things.
First, I’ll talk about Dragon*Con and what it held for me this year. Really, it was nothing fancy, by my estimation. I enjoyed it, of course. And, there was plenty to do. It was just that aside from seeing the one star I wanted to, and doing some shopping for a few off the wall items (some of which I was not able to get - more to follow), it was a fairly dull convention, and it did not live up to some of the wonder I had built it up to be. Let me start with what I thought was right about it.
Costuming. Excellent costumes again this year. I was impressed by several of them, and many others, just by the effort. I always love to look at the creativity people put into dressing up for these things, and this Dragon*Con was no exception. I’ve always wanted to do costuming, however, my one true effort at it was overcome by a weight gain, so, my musketeer costume does not fit properly anymore. More on this point to follow, as well.
Gaming. Great venues for gaming this year. Though I don’t get to enjoy it as much when I just go for one day, I was impressed by the location and the setup for it. Tournaments had their own space and open gaming had its own space. Miniatures, CCGs, and computer gaming all had their own separate, and roomy areas. The upside to this is that if you were looking for something in particular, you could find it, and probably get a chance to jump in on something. I always like to demo or try games I have not played at conventions, so that I can broaden my horizons. This convention was no exception, as I was able to play a game of Vinci, which was new to me. Very easy to learn, and fun to play.
Staff and organization. Overall, very well done. Traffic flow was pretty smooth with people in many of the areas, with only a couple of exceptions, which were traffic choke points when I first went in 2002, were again in 2006, when I returned, so, it was no surprise to me that they still were this year. I was able to find easily what I wanted to see, so, from that respect, I believe it was well organized. The staff was friendly and courteous (at least to me, and what I observed).
Guests. As usual, there were plenty of media guests from just about every aspect of science fiction and fantasy you could imagine. While there were several I could have stood in line to see, I made it a point to only go to one or two, as on my previous excursions, I ran out of money for autographs, as well as it took lots of time to get to the guests. So, this year, I had in mind to just go see Gil Gerard (Buck Rogers of the 1980 vintage TV show). Part of it was because I met Erin Gray from the show last year, and got an autographed picture, so, I wanted to get one from him, and have a matched set. Another part of wanting to meet him was that I had heard his health history story on Entertainment Tonight (there was a full special on Discovery Health called Action Hero Makeover about it, as well). He was over 350 pounds, and, by his own admission, every one of his numbers was way off the charts, except for his blood pressure. He had stomach surgery, and is now, in my opinion, about the same weight he appeared to be on the show (I may be off in my estimation, but, it is estimation, after all). I did get to meet him, and he was a very likeable guy. I got my autograph, and, when he was done with it, I chatted with him about the health issue, and how inspiring it was to me that he was able to overcome it. He then asked me if I wanted a t-shirt. I asked about it, and he wanted to know if I knew the story behind the t-shirt. I said no, and this is what he told me: About 25 years ago, someone designed a screen print and gave it to him, gratis, for him to use - to be his design. He put it away, and it ended up in storage. Recently, he found the design again, had it digitized, ordered up 100 shirts, and had them sent directly to Dragon*Con specifically for the con. I asked him about sizes. He said the biggest he had was XXL. I said, "I’ll take one. And that, along with your story, will be my inspiration to get down to being able to fit in a two x shirt again." He sold me the shirt, and wished me luck on it, glad that he could help be an inspiration, even if it was just a small way. It made me feel really good that he seemed interested in what I had to say and my motivations on it. But, from my past trips to Dragon*Con, this is the same way every guest I met has reacted to fan conversations that either I was party to or witness to. It makes me feel that they are normal people, not trying to be above the fans, and, some, even eternally grateful to the fans for helping them be successful as actors, artists, or writers. That sort of mentality gives me a good feeling.
Finally, seeing my friends. Two friends of mine live in England now. I attended their wedding as part of my honeymoon, and have not seen them since that time - one year ago. So, I was very eager to see my friends again. In the past, my friend who lives in Maine has come down, I have a friend in Atlanta who has gone, and, over the years, you make a few friends n the con circuit, and, every once in a while, you run into them, as well. This year was just the English contingent, and, towards the end of the day, we all met up with our Atlanta friend. That sort of thing gives a familiarity to the event that would not otherwise be there. Last year, I went alone, and had a great time, but, it was not the same. Having the shared experience makes what would have been rather boring and dull (mostly) entertaining. And, I certainly would not have done some of the things I did had it not been for my friends (I was prepared to eat MREs to avoid food expense, I learned about an online mapmaking program, and entered to take a chance at a customized gaming laptop, as well as played a new game with them).
On to the parts that were not so good, in my opinion.
Dealers. This year, there were plenty of them, and plenty of exhibitors, as well. However, I went looking for particular gaming items, and did not find them. I wanted, in particular, a couple of RPG books from a rather obscure game publisher, and could not find anything from that publisher at all, let alone what I was looking for. I was also looking for some Axis & Allies War at Sea individual figures, and there were none of those around, either. I wanted to find some Magic decks for a co-worker, and could not find any starters. While I did find some great games and gaming items I was looking for, I was limited to Troll & Toad, Atlas Games, and Chessex for the stuff I wanted, and was unsuccessful at all other endeavors. A few bright spots: I got Mr. T in Your Pocket, Cajun in Your Pocket, Brian (from Family Guy) in Your Pocket, and Da Mayor (of Chocolate City fame) in Your Pocket; I got the Family Guy Drinking Dice Game; I got some additional zombies for the game of the same title (great beer and pretzels game); I got Dust and Die Macher for great prices; I got a replacement die, new dice color set, dice boot, ocean hex mat, miniature box and dice bag from Chessex; I got three GURPS 4th Ed. Books, which got me three 3rd Ed books for free; and probably a few things I’m forgetting.
Panels. I have attended panels in the past, just this year, there were none I wanted to go to. Don’t get me wrong, there were plenty around the con, on just about every topic imaginable, I just had no inclination to go to any of them.
Gaming. Yes, I had them in the good, but they were also in the bad. The space was a little smaller this year, overall, and, there were no good games dealers to help drive the gaming. That is a bad combination. They can both help each other out, but they have to talk to each other. It seemed that they did not, and, when I tried out that new game, I could not find it, nor did the sellers offer me a card to see if they could order what I wanted. The dealers that had collectible stuff were selling singles of everything but what I wanted. There was one guy who was selling Pirates of the Spanish Main singles, but, this year, I was not going after those, so, he was not helpful. It was a little bit of a letdown.
I think that about covers the con. No on to other issues.
I learned that my sister-in-law is a beer connoisseur. She wanted to take a trip to World of Beverages, so, I volunteered to go along. I was impressed - they had lots of variety on just about anything you could imagine, not to mention beers. I was doubly impressed when I found not only Abita (a favorite micro brew locally), but also Baltika, a Russian beer that I was very fond of while on my study abroad program in Moscow. I was very happy when I walked out of there $60 poorer.
My mother-in-law is concerned over my wife’s diabetes, and has asked me for my help in getting both of our weights down. I’m up for that, and the Gil Gerard incident just gave me motivation that I could shout from the mountain top. Great match up of goals, opportunities, and happenstances.
My Dad is just as weird as he ever was, but he means well, and cares about us, even if he still likes to drink himself silly from time to time. It’s a little annoying at times, but, he does mean well.
What all this led us to believe on the drive home was that part of what makes life difficult for us here in New Orleans is that we have no true support structure here. It seems to be just us against the world. My mother is loony. Our friends who are here that we have known long enough to be helpful really are the type to "you think you’ve got it bad, you ought to know what we’re going through" us. Our friends who could be supportive are relatively new friends, or are so busy with their own families that we don’t get together as often as we would like. Our support structure is outlined in the above paragraphs - and out of New Orleans. However, we could not imaging living anywhere else. It is where we are familiar. Where we know what’s going on, have roots, and feel like we belong. No where else in the world has that feeling for my wife and I. That is the crux of it. We are trying to rebuild, and have no support except for each other here in the city. It is difficult, but it is worth it. At least to us.
First, I’ll talk about Dragon*Con and what it held for me this year. Really, it was nothing fancy, by my estimation. I enjoyed it, of course. And, there was plenty to do. It was just that aside from seeing the one star I wanted to, and doing some shopping for a few off the wall items (some of which I was not able to get - more to follow), it was a fairly dull convention, and it did not live up to some of the wonder I had built it up to be. Let me start with what I thought was right about it.
Costuming. Excellent costumes again this year. I was impressed by several of them, and many others, just by the effort. I always love to look at the creativity people put into dressing up for these things, and this Dragon*Con was no exception. I’ve always wanted to do costuming, however, my one true effort at it was overcome by a weight gain, so, my musketeer costume does not fit properly anymore. More on this point to follow, as well.
Gaming. Great venues for gaming this year. Though I don’t get to enjoy it as much when I just go for one day, I was impressed by the location and the setup for it. Tournaments had their own space and open gaming had its own space. Miniatures, CCGs, and computer gaming all had their own separate, and roomy areas. The upside to this is that if you were looking for something in particular, you could find it, and probably get a chance to jump in on something. I always like to demo or try games I have not played at conventions, so that I can broaden my horizons. This convention was no exception, as I was able to play a game of Vinci, which was new to me. Very easy to learn, and fun to play.
Staff and organization. Overall, very well done. Traffic flow was pretty smooth with people in many of the areas, with only a couple of exceptions, which were traffic choke points when I first went in 2002, were again in 2006, when I returned, so, it was no surprise to me that they still were this year. I was able to find easily what I wanted to see, so, from that respect, I believe it was well organized. The staff was friendly and courteous (at least to me, and what I observed).
Guests. As usual, there were plenty of media guests from just about every aspect of science fiction and fantasy you could imagine. While there were several I could have stood in line to see, I made it a point to only go to one or two, as on my previous excursions, I ran out of money for autographs, as well as it took lots of time to get to the guests. So, this year, I had in mind to just go see Gil Gerard (Buck Rogers of the 1980 vintage TV show). Part of it was because I met Erin Gray from the show last year, and got an autographed picture, so, I wanted to get one from him, and have a matched set. Another part of wanting to meet him was that I had heard his health history story on Entertainment Tonight (there was a full special on Discovery Health called Action Hero Makeover about it, as well). He was over 350 pounds, and, by his own admission, every one of his numbers was way off the charts, except for his blood pressure. He had stomach surgery, and is now, in my opinion, about the same weight he appeared to be on the show (I may be off in my estimation, but, it is estimation, after all). I did get to meet him, and he was a very likeable guy. I got my autograph, and, when he was done with it, I chatted with him about the health issue, and how inspiring it was to me that he was able to overcome it. He then asked me if I wanted a t-shirt. I asked about it, and he wanted to know if I knew the story behind the t-shirt. I said no, and this is what he told me: About 25 years ago, someone designed a screen print and gave it to him, gratis, for him to use - to be his design. He put it away, and it ended up in storage. Recently, he found the design again, had it digitized, ordered up 100 shirts, and had them sent directly to Dragon*Con specifically for the con. I asked him about sizes. He said the biggest he had was XXL. I said, "I’ll take one. And that, along with your story, will be my inspiration to get down to being able to fit in a two x shirt again." He sold me the shirt, and wished me luck on it, glad that he could help be an inspiration, even if it was just a small way. It made me feel really good that he seemed interested in what I had to say and my motivations on it. But, from my past trips to Dragon*Con, this is the same way every guest I met has reacted to fan conversations that either I was party to or witness to. It makes me feel that they are normal people, not trying to be above the fans, and, some, even eternally grateful to the fans for helping them be successful as actors, artists, or writers. That sort of mentality gives me a good feeling.
Finally, seeing my friends. Two friends of mine live in England now. I attended their wedding as part of my honeymoon, and have not seen them since that time - one year ago. So, I was very eager to see my friends again. In the past, my friend who lives in Maine has come down, I have a friend in Atlanta who has gone, and, over the years, you make a few friends n the con circuit, and, every once in a while, you run into them, as well. This year was just the English contingent, and, towards the end of the day, we all met up with our Atlanta friend. That sort of thing gives a familiarity to the event that would not otherwise be there. Last year, I went alone, and had a great time, but, it was not the same. Having the shared experience makes what would have been rather boring and dull (mostly) entertaining. And, I certainly would not have done some of the things I did had it not been for my friends (I was prepared to eat MREs to avoid food expense, I learned about an online mapmaking program, and entered to take a chance at a customized gaming laptop, as well as played a new game with them).
On to the parts that were not so good, in my opinion.
Dealers. This year, there were plenty of them, and plenty of exhibitors, as well. However, I went looking for particular gaming items, and did not find them. I wanted, in particular, a couple of RPG books from a rather obscure game publisher, and could not find anything from that publisher at all, let alone what I was looking for. I was also looking for some Axis & Allies War at Sea individual figures, and there were none of those around, either. I wanted to find some Magic decks for a co-worker, and could not find any starters. While I did find some great games and gaming items I was looking for, I was limited to Troll & Toad, Atlas Games, and Chessex for the stuff I wanted, and was unsuccessful at all other endeavors. A few bright spots: I got Mr. T in Your Pocket, Cajun in Your Pocket, Brian (from Family Guy) in Your Pocket, and Da Mayor (of Chocolate City fame) in Your Pocket; I got the Family Guy Drinking Dice Game; I got some additional zombies for the game of the same title (great beer and pretzels game); I got Dust and Die Macher for great prices; I got a replacement die, new dice color set, dice boot, ocean hex mat, miniature box and dice bag from Chessex; I got three GURPS 4th Ed. Books, which got me three 3rd Ed books for free; and probably a few things I’m forgetting.
Panels. I have attended panels in the past, just this year, there were none I wanted to go to. Don’t get me wrong, there were plenty around the con, on just about every topic imaginable, I just had no inclination to go to any of them.
Gaming. Yes, I had them in the good, but they were also in the bad. The space was a little smaller this year, overall, and, there were no good games dealers to help drive the gaming. That is a bad combination. They can both help each other out, but they have to talk to each other. It seemed that they did not, and, when I tried out that new game, I could not find it, nor did the sellers offer me a card to see if they could order what I wanted. The dealers that had collectible stuff were selling singles of everything but what I wanted. There was one guy who was selling Pirates of the Spanish Main singles, but, this year, I was not going after those, so, he was not helpful. It was a little bit of a letdown.
I think that about covers the con. No on to other issues.
I learned that my sister-in-law is a beer connoisseur. She wanted to take a trip to World of Beverages, so, I volunteered to go along. I was impressed - they had lots of variety on just about anything you could imagine, not to mention beers. I was doubly impressed when I found not only Abita (a favorite micro brew locally), but also Baltika, a Russian beer that I was very fond of while on my study abroad program in Moscow. I was very happy when I walked out of there $60 poorer.
My mother-in-law is concerned over my wife’s diabetes, and has asked me for my help in getting both of our weights down. I’m up for that, and the Gil Gerard incident just gave me motivation that I could shout from the mountain top. Great match up of goals, opportunities, and happenstances.
My Dad is just as weird as he ever was, but he means well, and cares about us, even if he still likes to drink himself silly from time to time. It’s a little annoying at times, but, he does mean well.
What all this led us to believe on the drive home was that part of what makes life difficult for us here in New Orleans is that we have no true support structure here. It seems to be just us against the world. My mother is loony. Our friends who are here that we have known long enough to be helpful really are the type to "you think you’ve got it bad, you ought to know what we’re going through" us. Our friends who could be supportive are relatively new friends, or are so busy with their own families that we don’t get together as often as we would like. Our support structure is outlined in the above paragraphs - and out of New Orleans. However, we could not imaging living anywhere else. It is where we are familiar. Where we know what’s going on, have roots, and feel like we belong. No where else in the world has that feeling for my wife and I. That is the crux of it. We are trying to rebuild, and have no support except for each other here in the city. It is difficult, but it is worth it. At least to us.
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Two Years Ago Today
Two years ago today saw the worst natural disaster to hit the United States. Ever. That was the day that everything changed around here. The city had become a ghost town, as most of the population that could and wanted to had already left. Windows were boarded up, cars placed on neutral grounds (that's a median strip to the rest of the country) or in high rise parking garages, when available, everything was either tied down, or otherwise secured, and people that had left thought that they would be back in just a couple of days, as had happened before with Ivan and Georges. That was not to be.
On the morning of the 29th of August, Katrina passed south of the city of New Orleans, right through Buras, Louisiana. It came back into Gulf waters on the other side of the tip of Louisiana's boot, then aimed for the mouth of the Pearl River, on the border between Louisiana and Mississippi. After the storm initially passed, everything was fine. At least initially. The storm surge, coupled with the change of wind direction after the eye passed, created such pressure on the levee system, that breaches began to form. First, along the Industrial Canal, then the 17th Street Canal, then the Orleans Canal, another along the Industrial Canal, all followed by the flood of pent up water through neighborhoods. Being in Memphis as I was, I heard about it in stages, but, after the dust settled, I was able to peice together what had happened to my fouled up, but fair city.
Now, two years later, the water is gone. Many of the people are still gone. We have celebrities talking about building "green" homes, an army of Habitat for Humanity people are still here doing whatever they can to get homes built. College students still spend their vacations coming here to gut houses and help with recovery. Church groups are expanding their meal programs outside of the city. Our citizens are still scattered all aound the country - wherever they had relatives or decided to start over. In short, the New Orleans of old is no more. The NEW New Orleans is not yet here.
We are in a strange state of limbo, caught between yin and yang. Or, as was so elegantly put in an episode of Babylon 5, between tick and tock. The city is trying to decide whether to live or to die, in my opinion. There are stalwarts who will tell you that New Orleans will never go away, that we will come back better than before, that we shall rise up. There are just as many who say, "Yeah, prove it."
Personally, I find myself torn every day between the two camps. I want my home to be successful and back the way it was. However, each day, it takes twice as much effort to do even the simplest of tasks. Street lights are still out all over the place. Many favorite restaurants are not open, some permanently, others replaced by new ones. Businesses have folded, compressed, cut down to one of a particular kind in the area, etc.. I know I'm not the only one who wants to wake up and have it all back like it was before. Virtually every person around here wants that.
There are a few bright spots, though. The Saints have done well in lifting our spirits. Some of the good old favorites are back - gelatto at Brocatto's or snoballs at Hansen's or Plum Street. Camellia Grill is finally back open. Jazz Fest and Mardi Gras continue, as do the other festivals in the area.
There are bad spots, too. Crime is almost as bad as it was before Katrina, and we have fewer people. Our politicians keep going to jail in public corruption schemes. Blight is everywhere, and you'd have to be blind to miss it. There is a general malaise over the city, and everyone knows it. No one wants to do anything about it, and we are all deluding ourselves with stuff, fantasy, and other distractions to keep us from focusing on what we need to do. We all want someone else to take care of our stuff for us.
We either expect the government to bails us out completely, or we wait for anyone else to come along to tell us what to do and how to do it. We point blame everywhere except where it belongs: squarely on the shoulders of everyone who stays here or wants to come back here.
We are responsible for our own actions. We must pick ourselves up. It is not a Road Home program, or FEMA money that will save us. We must do it. I have great hope and faith in the movements against violence in our city. The people are trying to take back their neighborhoods. With the help of total strangers, we are doing it. It will just take time. In this world of instant gratification, we are led to believe that everything should be instant - now. Well, ask the folks in Florida about things being right immediately. Ask the residents of Kobe, Japan if things are put back together immediately. Ask California residents if post-earthquake, things just pop right back up. We will come back.
On a final note, I, personally, would like to say thank you to the Memphis Red Cross, and the citizens of Memphis who took good care of my wife and I during our evacuation there. I would also like to thank the folks of Baton Rouge, who tolerated me for 4 months while I was in exile from my home. Also, a huge thank you to all the volunteers, care workers, agency people, and, expecially, the U.S. Army, the National Guard, the Coast Guard, the U.S. Navy, the U.S. Marine Corps, and the police, fire, rescue agencies of all the states and municipalities who sent people and/or aid to our area. Without you, we would not have been able to come back. Without you, we would not be able to continue our struggle to be back. Thank you. Thank you, all.
K
On the morning of the 29th of August, Katrina passed south of the city of New Orleans, right through Buras, Louisiana. It came back into Gulf waters on the other side of the tip of Louisiana's boot, then aimed for the mouth of the Pearl River, on the border between Louisiana and Mississippi. After the storm initially passed, everything was fine. At least initially. The storm surge, coupled with the change of wind direction after the eye passed, created such pressure on the levee system, that breaches began to form. First, along the Industrial Canal, then the 17th Street Canal, then the Orleans Canal, another along the Industrial Canal, all followed by the flood of pent up water through neighborhoods. Being in Memphis as I was, I heard about it in stages, but, after the dust settled, I was able to peice together what had happened to my fouled up, but fair city.
Now, two years later, the water is gone. Many of the people are still gone. We have celebrities talking about building "green" homes, an army of Habitat for Humanity people are still here doing whatever they can to get homes built. College students still spend their vacations coming here to gut houses and help with recovery. Church groups are expanding their meal programs outside of the city. Our citizens are still scattered all aound the country - wherever they had relatives or decided to start over. In short, the New Orleans of old is no more. The NEW New Orleans is not yet here.
We are in a strange state of limbo, caught between yin and yang. Or, as was so elegantly put in an episode of Babylon 5, between tick and tock. The city is trying to decide whether to live or to die, in my opinion. There are stalwarts who will tell you that New Orleans will never go away, that we will come back better than before, that we shall rise up. There are just as many who say, "Yeah, prove it."
Personally, I find myself torn every day between the two camps. I want my home to be successful and back the way it was. However, each day, it takes twice as much effort to do even the simplest of tasks. Street lights are still out all over the place. Many favorite restaurants are not open, some permanently, others replaced by new ones. Businesses have folded, compressed, cut down to one of a particular kind in the area, etc.. I know I'm not the only one who wants to wake up and have it all back like it was before. Virtually every person around here wants that.
There are a few bright spots, though. The Saints have done well in lifting our spirits. Some of the good old favorites are back - gelatto at Brocatto's or snoballs at Hansen's or Plum Street. Camellia Grill is finally back open. Jazz Fest and Mardi Gras continue, as do the other festivals in the area.
There are bad spots, too. Crime is almost as bad as it was before Katrina, and we have fewer people. Our politicians keep going to jail in public corruption schemes. Blight is everywhere, and you'd have to be blind to miss it. There is a general malaise over the city, and everyone knows it. No one wants to do anything about it, and we are all deluding ourselves with stuff, fantasy, and other distractions to keep us from focusing on what we need to do. We all want someone else to take care of our stuff for us.
We either expect the government to bails us out completely, or we wait for anyone else to come along to tell us what to do and how to do it. We point blame everywhere except where it belongs: squarely on the shoulders of everyone who stays here or wants to come back here.
We are responsible for our own actions. We must pick ourselves up. It is not a Road Home program, or FEMA money that will save us. We must do it. I have great hope and faith in the movements against violence in our city. The people are trying to take back their neighborhoods. With the help of total strangers, we are doing it. It will just take time. In this world of instant gratification, we are led to believe that everything should be instant - now. Well, ask the folks in Florida about things being right immediately. Ask the residents of Kobe, Japan if things are put back together immediately. Ask California residents if post-earthquake, things just pop right back up. We will come back.
On a final note, I, personally, would like to say thank you to the Memphis Red Cross, and the citizens of Memphis who took good care of my wife and I during our evacuation there. I would also like to thank the folks of Baton Rouge, who tolerated me for 4 months while I was in exile from my home. Also, a huge thank you to all the volunteers, care workers, agency people, and, expecially, the U.S. Army, the National Guard, the Coast Guard, the U.S. Navy, the U.S. Marine Corps, and the police, fire, rescue agencies of all the states and municipalities who sent people and/or aid to our area. Without you, we would not have been able to come back. Without you, we would not be able to continue our struggle to be back. Thank you. Thank you, all.
K
Monday, August 27, 2007
Just Another Monday
I was hoping to have some creative writing here, at some point. However, real life has dictated otherwise. Work continues to be work, and, the bosses are up to something. When there are closed door meetings, it is never good. At least that has been my experience. Hopefully, today will be just another run of the hormones by the female bosses, and not anything to worry about. I think there is some issue over someone not paying their bill. I hope it's not on anyof the work I did, and, from what I can tell right now, I am correct. Only time will tell for sure.
OK, so, that was just panicing. Not surprising, considering what I've gone through in the past few years. I just have to remind myself that as long as I keep doing my work, and do it well, they won't do anything to me, despite the previous actions of other employers. I just have to keep telling myself that.....
Anyway, the big trip to Dragon*Con is coming up in a few days. I know I will only have one day there, but, considering that I don't go to any other cons, it's all good for me. My mother-in-law lives in Atlanta, so, we go, and I get my day for fun out of the deal. It's not bad really, and with it falling close after my birthday, I get some special treatment, and usually a little extra cash to spend at the con. That is always a good thing. And, this year, some friends of mine are coming in from England for the con, so, I will get to see them. I haven't seen them since their wedding last year (we took our honeymoon so that it would coincide with their wedding). That will be an added bonus to the trip for me.
In other news, well, I'm staying away from political commentary and such. Not that I've been terribl burned in blogs/journals before, however, I am trying to avoid posting about that, except in the rare circumstance that I am venting about things here in NOLA.
Well, I have succeeded in maintaining my posting record by posting today. I will have something else for next week, unless I get creative before then. Though I seriously doubt it, with the con looming in the distance.
K
OK, so, that was just panicing. Not surprising, considering what I've gone through in the past few years. I just have to remind myself that as long as I keep doing my work, and do it well, they won't do anything to me, despite the previous actions of other employers. I just have to keep telling myself that.....
Anyway, the big trip to Dragon*Con is coming up in a few days. I know I will only have one day there, but, considering that I don't go to any other cons, it's all good for me. My mother-in-law lives in Atlanta, so, we go, and I get my day for fun out of the deal. It's not bad really, and with it falling close after my birthday, I get some special treatment, and usually a little extra cash to spend at the con. That is always a good thing. And, this year, some friends of mine are coming in from England for the con, so, I will get to see them. I haven't seen them since their wedding last year (we took our honeymoon so that it would coincide with their wedding). That will be an added bonus to the trip for me.
In other news, well, I'm staying away from political commentary and such. Not that I've been terribl burned in blogs/journals before, however, I am trying to avoid posting about that, except in the rare circumstance that I am venting about things here in NOLA.
Well, I have succeeded in maintaining my posting record by posting today. I will have something else for next week, unless I get creative before then. Though I seriously doubt it, with the con looming in the distance.
K
Monday, August 20, 2007
The More Things Change, Part III
This is getting a little tiresome. Just a few days ago, I posted Part II here, thinking that my ultimate revelations on life, the universe and everything had been resolved, or at least, I had had my epiphany, and that would be the end of it. However, on Friday the 17th, despite my best efforts to ignore it and hope it would go away, I was forced to deal with Hurricane Dean. Granted, I did not have to deal with it in the same manner as Katrina, however, it was more than I wanted to at all.
You see, two years ago, it was on a Friday, when I went out for lunch with my "cool" co-workers for my birthday (celebrated a little late), that we had the discussion about the storm, and what would be involved with dealing with it. We had lunch at a great place called "Port of Call" (one of the best burgers in New Orleans). I should have known that there was something amiss when The Weather Channel was on the television instead of the usual variety of sports, even on a workday. We had lunch, and, just before we left for the weekend, my last words were that Katrina would turn before it could hit us, and we would be safe, I was not planning on evacuating. Well, when the storm became a Category 5 between midnight Saturday and 7 AM Sunday, it was going to make the turn, alright, but, it was too big and had too much momentum, so, it looked like it could very well hit the city. I evacuated, and passed word along to all concerned parties with my company. In CNN/Foxnews/MSNBC haze over the next three days, I found out that the storm did turn, just like I said it would. It just happened to be west of the mouth of the Mississippi River instead of east of it, therefore Buras took the big hit, and New Orleans got the west side of the storm.
This year, it was deja vu all over again. It was a Friday, there were birthday celebrations planned/going on, and here there was another freaking storm in the freaking Carribean. Our plan was to visit with the folks in Baton Rouge that put us up during Katrina. Everything was having a very familiar ring to it. All anyone at work could talk about on the 17th was Dean and what the forecast track was. One of my current co-workers is planing on going to Cancun for vacation Labor Day weekend, so, that was the big crisis - was there going to be a Cancun to go to. I had hoped that I would never have to look at another hurricane forecast and give my estimates for a long time. It seems that two years was the max limit for that.
Last year, I did not look at anything related to a storm. I was not worried about it, or, more accurately, I was ignoring it. We were fortunate that there was nothing of any significance headed our way, but, still, I let my post-traumatic stress dominate my responses to the weather.
Now, faced with that same situation again, I made the decision to face the fear that had secretly gripped me for all this time. I looked things up, talked to people about the factors in making the predictions, my accuracy over the years, and all the other things that I was trying to keep buried. On one level, it was gratifying for everyone to look to me for the answers that I had previously been so quick with. On another level, I was still afraid, as things were looking the same, yet again.
I fought through my fear. I guess, that is what courage is all about. Acting despite your fear, instead of it being the absence of fear. Now, I realize a little more about growing up, and learning from where we've been. While I still believe that the more things change, the more they stay the same, I am beginning to see and enjoy the opportunities that life has a way of placing in our path so that while things are the same, they are also able to change.
K
You see, two years ago, it was on a Friday, when I went out for lunch with my "cool" co-workers for my birthday (celebrated a little late), that we had the discussion about the storm, and what would be involved with dealing with it. We had lunch at a great place called "Port of Call" (one of the best burgers in New Orleans). I should have known that there was something amiss when The Weather Channel was on the television instead of the usual variety of sports, even on a workday. We had lunch, and, just before we left for the weekend, my last words were that Katrina would turn before it could hit us, and we would be safe, I was not planning on evacuating. Well, when the storm became a Category 5 between midnight Saturday and 7 AM Sunday, it was going to make the turn, alright, but, it was too big and had too much momentum, so, it looked like it could very well hit the city. I evacuated, and passed word along to all concerned parties with my company. In CNN/Foxnews/MSNBC haze over the next three days, I found out that the storm did turn, just like I said it would. It just happened to be west of the mouth of the Mississippi River instead of east of it, therefore Buras took the big hit, and New Orleans got the west side of the storm.
This year, it was deja vu all over again. It was a Friday, there were birthday celebrations planned/going on, and here there was another freaking storm in the freaking Carribean. Our plan was to visit with the folks in Baton Rouge that put us up during Katrina. Everything was having a very familiar ring to it. All anyone at work could talk about on the 17th was Dean and what the forecast track was. One of my current co-workers is planing on going to Cancun for vacation Labor Day weekend, so, that was the big crisis - was there going to be a Cancun to go to. I had hoped that I would never have to look at another hurricane forecast and give my estimates for a long time. It seems that two years was the max limit for that.
Last year, I did not look at anything related to a storm. I was not worried about it, or, more accurately, I was ignoring it. We were fortunate that there was nothing of any significance headed our way, but, still, I let my post-traumatic stress dominate my responses to the weather.
Now, faced with that same situation again, I made the decision to face the fear that had secretly gripped me for all this time. I looked things up, talked to people about the factors in making the predictions, my accuracy over the years, and all the other things that I was trying to keep buried. On one level, it was gratifying for everyone to look to me for the answers that I had previously been so quick with. On another level, I was still afraid, as things were looking the same, yet again.
I fought through my fear. I guess, that is what courage is all about. Acting despite your fear, instead of it being the absence of fear. Now, I realize a little more about growing up, and learning from where we've been. While I still believe that the more things change, the more they stay the same, I am beginning to see and enjoy the opportunities that life has a way of placing in our path so that while things are the same, they are also able to change.
K
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